Funny Non Quotable quotes :)

I was born intelligent – education ruined me!!

I am always right, Never wrong. I thought I was wrong once, but I was wrong….

I got my looks from my dad…He’s a plastic surgeon….

Hard work never kills anybody… but why take a chance????

Practice makes a man perfect…..But nobody’s perfect……so why practice?

Who says nothing is impossible??? I have been doin nothing for years….

Don’t feel bad. A lot of people have no talent….

I know KUNG FU KARATE….and 47 other dangerous words….

I am in shape…Round is a shape….

I alwayz arrive late to the office….but I make up for it by leaving early….

A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station….

If at first u don’t succeed….destroy all evidence that u ever tried….

Most desired things in this world are either illegal, banned….or married to someone else!!!!

You can’t buy love, but it is a big expense 🙂

Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is the husband….

There is only one perfect wife in the world and every neighbor has it!!

They call our language the mother tongue because the father seldom gets to speak….

Don’t drink and drive, you risk spilling the holy spirit

Alcohol doesn’t solve any problems, but if u think again, neither does milk!!!!

Tequila Mantra…1 tequila..2 tequila..3 tequila..Floor!!!!

I love animals….They are so tasty….

Don’t hit me, my lawyer is in jail….


About Ranjeet Elkunchwar

Read my blog..and you shall know ! View all posts by Ranjeet Elkunchwar

3 responses to “Funny Non Quotable quotes :)

  • hridayramshenoy

    This reminds me of a section in Reader’s Digest titled ‘Towards more picturesque speech’, that had something similar and would begin with ‘I wanted to be…’ Some really good ones i remember are:

    1. I wanted to be a farmer…but i didnt cultivate the habit
    2. I wanted to be an actor…but my father made a scene
    3. I wanted to be a magazine editor…but i didnt want to make an issue of it.
    4. I wanted to be an archaeologist…but i didnt want my career in ruins
    5. I wanted to be a dentist….but i didnt want to lead a hand-to-mouth existence. 😀 😀 😀

  • Saee

    LOL..nice collection. 🙂

  • Nikhil Kardale

    Good collection! 🙂
    Have used a couple of them as Gtalk status messages in the past.. they are really funny..

    Thanks for sharing those funny lines too!

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